A documentary called “Race To Nowhere” is being screened at LIU, CW Post this Friday. I viewed the trailer online and found it so on point highlighting and painfully pressing the issue of today’s demands and pressures assaulting our children in our current educational environment. I remember not too many years ago as a School Counseling student listening in on a presentation by a college representative speaking to anxious parents of juniors just beginning the college search and preparatory process. What struck me was this: Your kid had to be a “Super Student” or else he’s not getting in to that college. The competition is fierce; there are only so many slots for new enrollees.
They not only needed excellent grades, and not only needed to be on the team but they needed to be LEADERS, CAPTAINS, PRESIDENTS….think about this, now…how many students can actually be the captains and presidents among how many students in the school? Not many. It's a futile effort for most.
You need a rigorous course load. You need to get into honors and take AP courses if you want to get a scholarship…
Mommy and Daddy can’t afford college, so it’s up to you to get that athletic, music, merit scholarship. Up to ME? Oh God…I’m overwhelmed. I can’t handle the pressure.
Melt down.
Parents melt down, argue, and feel depressed that they can’t do more for their kids. They inwardly cringe when their child salivates at a fancy college sweatshirt or lax shorts sporting famous university names such as Duke, Syracuse, etc…We can never afford to send them there.
Kids meltdown feeling guilty and embarrassed that they can’t hack the tough courses and handle all the extracurricular activities. They are exhausted and depressed. What’s their future going to be like? Hopelessness kicks in, a very bad thing.
What to do? Well, I’d love to see the film “Race To Nowhere” and see what it suggests, possibly revamping our whole way of thinking….reverse the “It’s never too early to start thinking about college” mindset. I always shuddered at that concept because it doesn’t let kids be fun, silly and goofy, yet studious kids. It introduced a brand new feeling to them: anxiety, something brought into play way too young. “I don’t know what I want to be! Oh, no! Shouldn’t I know? What's wrong with me?” Kids don’t know who they are yet….do any of us know who we are yet? I’m an ever evolving creature and am a lifelong learner discovering new interests all of the time. How can a 5th grader or younger even think of college and why should they?
Can we stop racing and running around like lunatics and slow down a bit? Can we let our kids enjoy their high school life and take it slow? It goes too darn quickly. Can they play a sport for fun without the pressure of being the Allstar? Can they play an instrument for the sheer joy of it, the magic of creating beautiful sounds without the pressure of a perfect score at NYSSMA or SCMEA? Everything is a competition, a race to be the best of the best.
We all can’t be the best, but we can be who we are, a unique beautiful human being with a lot to give the world, no matter what.
