June 1st...sketching, writing, reading...The Wild Marquis/ Bibliophilia???

I love historical romances because they are so rich in texture and touches the senses so much that I feel I am walking into a musty library or attic and can feel the thick wrinkled leather of the old book bindings.  The Wild Marquis by Miranda Neville touches on another nobleman's past time, rare book collecting.  So fascinating and for book lovers like myself, I can't stop being intriqued by the varied nature of the works mentioned, some fictional, some real.  For being such a conservative british kingdom with the utmost strictness for decorom and deportment, they had an awful lot of ribauld and risque written works, and erotic illustrated works.  Perhaps because they were all laced up so tight and restricted with their thousand rules and more rules, they needed to let loose in secret with a forbidden fruit on paper.  I'm loving this book in all manners of the word, plot, characters, historical facts, it touches all of my senses; I'm completely immersed.  So, I'm going to go know and um, read my own forbidden fruit! Peace!

I Have Writer's Block...

I have been avoiding my computer.  I start cleaning, dusting, folding laundry, wandering outside....I have my notebook and jot a few ideas, but none of them seem to go anywhere...

I started typing this morning feeling that how am I ever going to get published if I don't type something?  I have a bunch..a lot of written stories, but I don't feel like going back and editing them.  I have a work in progress for a Regency story that I think will be too complicated and tricky with the historical accuracy, dates, events, etc...I haven't been able to go back to it and just start typing. I like to have my plot figured out in advance and I can't seem to get my mind focused enough to do it.  At Dunes and Dreams at Pindar I was so surprised that one author, Beatrice Small told me she nevers does that.  She just writes and let's the creative process flow... Wow.  I could try that and let the twists and turns happen as they may, but I can't seem to do it.

My head gets foggy.  I get tired...I know what it is...it's fear of failure.  It's fear of, what if I really can't do this? I really am not organized enough, and simply am not that good a writer.  So, here I am at my blog instead where it is safe and anything goes. Yeah. That's helpful.  That'll get me published and who the hell am I talking to anyway?  Is anyone listening?  Probably not.  This is more of a cathartic thing then anything.  I'm talking to myself.  Am I going crazy?  Writers block makes me crazy.

Well....it's a nice day, a light breeze blowing, and it looks extremely inviting out there.  Yup.  I am procrastinating some more.  I have been fighting probably the worst sinus infection/allergies of my life and it is draining me.  I feel extremely sleepy.   You know what? If the creative juices aren't flowing they aren't flowing.

Besides, Lady Cecelia is thinking, when the heck are you going to finish me???  Soon.  Lady C.  soon....

As U2 says, "I need a miracle drug."  Maybe a run will clear the cobwebs from my head and pump up some endorphines...Try again later.