Writing, Painting, Writing, Painting...creative juices are flowing!

My Phineas Bloom's Letter painting is all out of proportion and looks completely cartoony and amateurish...I haven't attacked it in a while.  I am on the verge of trashing it, and calling that one a disaster!  BUT...I feel like it must be worth saving, so I am going to brush and wash and stroke it until it comes to life.  It seems I'm a persistent bugger, and do have a "don't give up" attitutude after all. I almost did that with my other two paintings, Lady Cecilia and Lord Rosemont.  I was scared to death to paint the sketched faces....did everything but.  I had a faceless painting filled with color everywhere but the circular area of the canvas which was to be the face.  It was tortuous.
Well, time to head downstairs and pull out my painting of Phinny in her diaphanous nightrail in the glow of candlelight in her bedroom brooding over a letter....story to come eventually.
I'm also working pretty intensely on one of my Regency Romance novels, which after tweaking and tweaking, I read it from start to finish, where I've left off, that is, no where near finished...just beginning really, and I liked it!  I wanted to see what would happen at the dinner party where the two opposing forces would meet again, male vs. female.  I'll get to that later, too.  It has mystery, intrigue, loyal friendships, emotional inner demons to fight and a true tangible enemy on the periphery that brings all together and leads to an incredible discovery.

Gotta go!
Sorry to leave you hanging...but ...stay tuned...sdh

I Have Writer's Block...

I have been avoiding my computer.  I start cleaning, dusting, folding laundry, wandering outside....I have my notebook and jot a few ideas, but none of them seem to go anywhere...

I started typing this morning feeling that how am I ever going to get published if I don't type something?  I have a bunch..a lot of written stories, but I don't feel like going back and editing them.  I have a work in progress for a Regency story that I think will be too complicated and tricky with the historical accuracy, dates, events, etc...I haven't been able to go back to it and just start typing. I like to have my plot figured out in advance and I can't seem to get my mind focused enough to do it.  At Dunes and Dreams at Pindar I was so surprised that one author, Beatrice Small told me she nevers does that.  She just writes and let's the creative process flow... Wow.  I could try that and let the twists and turns happen as they may, but I can't seem to do it.

My head gets foggy.  I get tired...I know what it is...it's fear of failure.  It's fear of, what if I really can't do this? I really am not organized enough, and simply am not that good a writer.  So, here I am at my blog instead where it is safe and anything goes. Yeah. That's helpful.  That'll get me published and who the hell am I talking to anyway?  Is anyone listening?  Probably not.  This is more of a cathartic thing then anything.  I'm talking to myself.  Am I going crazy?  Writers block makes me crazy.

Well....it's a nice day, a light breeze blowing, and it looks extremely inviting out there.  Yup.  I am procrastinating some more.  I have been fighting probably the worst sinus infection/allergies of my life and it is draining me.  I feel extremely sleepy.   You know what? If the creative juices aren't flowing they aren't flowing.

Besides, Lady Cecelia is thinking, when the heck are you going to finish me???  Soon.  Lady C.  soon....

As U2 says, "I need a miracle drug."  Maybe a run will clear the cobwebs from my head and pump up some endorphines...Try again later.